What is separation anxiety?
This guide is meant for dogs who struggle when left alone. Your dog may be experiencing separation anxiety if the timing and signs below sound familiar.
Timing of distress
- Distress begins when you leave or just before you go
- Your dog is mostly calm when you’re home
Signs of distress
- Barking, whining, or howling
- Destruction (especially near doors or windows)
- Pacing or inability to settle
- Drooling, trembling, or heavy panting
- Anxiety may start with “leaving cues” like keys, shoes, or bags
These behaviors don’t happen when someone is home
A step-by-step guide for pet parents
Step 0: Support for readiness to learn
Step 0: Support for readiness to learn
Make sure your pet's nerves are under control and there is no discomfort during the learning process. You can consider CandidTails nutraceuticals to support this process. Find them here:
Step 1: Prevent total panic whenever possible.
Your first goal is to stop repeated panic episodes.
If your dog becomes very upset when left alone:
- Try not to leave them for longer than they can handle
- Arrange temporary help if needed (a petsitter, a friend or family member)
- Daycare (if your dog enjoys it)
- Consider a calming supplement to help them feel more at easy
Important
- Never punish destruction, barking, or accidents
- These behaviors happen because your dog is distressed, not misbehaving
BSAVA Principle
Every panic episode makes anxiety harder to overcome later.
Step 2: Ensure musculoskeletal and gastrointestinal comfort.
Ensure your pet does not experience discomfort in the joint or gut. These can amplify your pet's stress levels tremendously and limit your training.
Source
Step 3: Set Up a Calm, Safe Space
Step 3: Set Up a Calm, Safe Space
Help your dog feel secure while you’re gone.
Choose a space where your dog seems most relaxed
Provide:
- Comfortable bedding
- Familiar smells
- Soft background noise (CandidTails Calm playlist, radio or TV)
- Provide a long lasting chew or lickmat
Be careful with crates
Some dogs feel safer in crates, others feel trapped and panic more.If your dog tries to escape or becomes frantic, a crate is not the right choice
BSAVA principle: Perceived safety reduces emotional arousal.
Dogs cope better when they feel physically secure in their environment
Step 4: Take the Fear Out of “Leaving Cues”
Step 4: Take the fear Out of “Leaving Cues”
Dogs often learn that things like keys or shoes mean you’re leaving and then anxiety starts before you go.
Always keep greetings and goodbyes low-key
- No big emotional exits
- No dramatic reunions
Why this matters:
Your dog learns that these cues don’t always mean being left alone.
Exercises
A) Uncoupling departure cues from leaving
- Pick up common departure items such as keys, a coat, or a bag, and walk toward the door.
- Do not leave the house.
- Put the items back in their usual place and sit down again.
- Only repeat once your dog is calm and settled.
B) Behaviours to watch for (and pause the exercise if you notice them)
- Signs of increasing tension or distress as the cue is introduced
- Difficulty settling between repetitions
- Your dog closely following you or remaining fixed on your movements
C) Counter-conditioning / Response substitution for departure anxiety
- Ask your dog to sit and stay near the usual exit door.
- Take one or two steps away.
- Return to your dog and reward calm behaviour with food and/or gentle praise.
- Gradually increase both the distance and the time you move away, progressing toward the door.
- As your dog becomes more comfortable, slowly reduce food rewards and rely more on calm verbal praise.
- Once your dog can remain settled while you approach the door, briefly open and close it.
- Take a short step outside and return calmly.
BSAVA principle:Anticipatory anxiety is learned through association and can be reduced by breaking predictive cues.
Step 5: Teach Your Dog That You Always Come Back
Step 5: Teach Your Dog That You Always Come Back
(The most important step)
This is called gradual absence training.
Only begin this step after your dog does not fear the "leaving cues"
Exercise
Planned Training Departures
- Use planned, structured departures specifically for training.
- Start with very brief absences, lasting only seconds to a few minutes.
- Depart in a way that looks normal (for example: take your keys or bag and go to the car).
- Avoid exciting your dog for around 15 minutes before leaving. Keep interactions calm and neutral.
- Return within the planned time and do not extend the absence.
- When you return, remain calm and low-key. Avoid excited greetings or play for 10–15 minutes.
- Increase the length of absences only if there are no signs of anxiety before departure and no distress or over-excitement on return.
- Repeat planned training departures only when your dog is calm; avoid doing several in quick succession.
- Progress may be slow at first before longer absences become comfortable.
- For the exercise to be effective, your dog should remain calm both when you leave and when you return.
BSAVA principle: Fear responses are reduced through gradual, controlled exposure below the dog’s distress threshold.
Step 6: Encourage Calm Independence at Home
Step 6: Encourage Calm Independence at Home
Dogs with separation anxiety often stay very close to their people all day , which makes being alone harder.
Help your dog practice independence
- Reward them for resting away from you
- Encourage settling on a mat or bed nearby, not always touching
- Gently ignore attention-seeking when appropriate
This does not harm your bond. It helps your dog feel more confident and secure.
BSAVA principle: Emotional independence supports coping and resilience.
Step 7: Get Extra Help If Anxiety Is Severe
Step 7: Get Extra Help If Anxiety Is Severe
Some dogs move through these steps quickly, while others need much smaller, slower changes. If your dog becomes panicked immediately, struggles to settle at all, or seems unable to progress, focus on preventing panic episodes and consider involving your veterinarian for extra support.
Please talk to your veterinarian if:
- Panic starts immediately when you leave
- Your dog tries to escape or hurts themselves
- Training feels impossible because anxiety is so intense
- Progress stalls despite consistency
Extra support can help your dog stay calm enough to learn.
Behavioural Tips – Set Up for Success
✔ Stay calm and patient because dogs sense your emotions. If you are stressed, your dog will be too
✔ Build alone time gradually, always staying below your dog’s panick threshold
✔ Never punish your dog as this will only increase negative emotions
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